Apologies

For the long silence but home life has been tres hectic leaving little time for even my blog.  And the next month or so will be even more fraught as our home is ripped apart by the builders!  It will be worth it!  I have had some wonderful times with P which I shall impart with you all.  However tomorrow is my glorious birthday.  I am going away with P and my best friend for the weekend.  I shall be spending the night with my hussy who has promised me pampering treats including bubble bath, champagne and chocolates.  Oh and lots of pussy sucking.  I shall revel as she puts her head between my thighs and pleasures me for as long as I want.

Bliss.  Happy birthday to me...x

Asserting my authority

P's most recent visit didn't start well as my previous post described.  Getting her dates mixed up, not checking properly beforehand.  The kind of thing that annoys me.  I'd already decided against physical punishment.  I find that making her have a more mentally stimulating punishment helps her to focus on what went wrong and how to prevent it from happening again.  Though I have in the past used both physical and mental punishments combined to good effect.  I gave her 100 lines.  As my hussy is a teacher, it's an ironic and fitting punishment.  You may think I let her off lightly.  But she knew I was disappointed in her.  And often that is enough for her, to know she has let me down.  I had already given her a small lecture regarding her error.  She pledged to ensure all her dates and arrangements were double checked and written down in her diary so that it wouldn't happen again.

I re-asserted my authority over her in many other ways, not just in my chamber or by way of lines etc as suitable punishment.  I expect her to service me however I choose.  And during her week long visit, she was put to full and proper use.  Foot massage, pedicures, painting nails, hand massage, head massage, ensuring my tea cup was rarely empty, kneeling at my feet, being my footstool as I watched TV.  In my chamber she is respectful, obeys all instructions, gives her body to me for my whims, offers her tongue for my pleasure - at once submissive yet trusting.

They may not seem much, but they all help to assert my authority over my hussy, whether she has erred or not.  I am also encouraging her to talk to me again inside and outside of my chamber.  I want to know what's going on inside her head.  I want to make sure she is happy and content.  I want to know if she has any fears or concerns.  I don't want her to fear me.  This is about mutual consent.  I push her limits, introduce her to new experiences, respect her hard zones.  Sometimes we flirt in public, she brushes my hand against her skirt - she isn't wearing panties.  I will exchange a look and she will lower her eyes.  My beautiful hussy.  She knows who's boss.

Still learning a lesson

My hussy should be here with me today.  But she isn't.  Instead she is still at home.  It may only be a trivial issue but my hussy never checks up on her arrangements.  For her, that arrangement is a simple one - cattery.  Her lovely two cats get their own week's holiday while she visits me.  She usually arranges this in advance, then promptly forgets what day they are supposed to be dropped off.  I have been asking her for a few weeks now to check when she was due to drop her cats off.  The only reply I have ever received was "Friday".  So I was all geared up for today, making sure her bed was ready etc etc.  The excitement levels were at a real high, full of anticipation and expectation.  Then last night she dropped the bombshell - she got her dates wrong.  She had the cattery booked from Saturday (tomorrow).

Trivial or not, my hussy never seems to check things properly, gets her dates and times muddled up.  I admit to being slightly confused in that when she is at work (as a teacher) she doesn't have these problems.  So obviously she has developed her own coping strategies and mechanisms not to miss a lesson, plan ahead and check dates and times.  I had a major issue with her last year when she missed a diary deadline completely because she went out socialising.  So to say I was miffed is an understatement.  I would have been really miffed if the cattery wasn't booked until next week especially as I have next week off work so we can be together.

Of course she knows she's in the dog house.  She knows she's going to get punished.  I have already devised a suitable punishment.  Not a physical one, I'm not vindictive.  Well I hope I'm not.  I'm sure there are some of you thinking it's a trivial matter and a sharp telling off is all that's required.  I know that doesn't work.  There needs to be something to back it up, teach her a lesson she is obviously still learning.  So after she has arrived sometime tomorrow, I will set out the punishment.  And it will be a taste of her own medicine.  As I've admonished her before, she wouldn't accept an excuse of being late or mixing up dates from her pupils and her colleagues wouldn't tolerate it if she did the same thing at work.

So trivial or not, she will accept her punishment and hopefully learn to check and double check any of her arrangements well in advance, write them down in her diary and tell me so I can make a note of them for back up.  Not the most auspicious start to our time off together, but I admit it also gets my dominant hormones racing.  Once it is done, it is done.  Slate clean.  And hopefully lesson well and truly learned.

Focusing the mind

My hussy has sent me 2 diaries since I sent her instructions.  The first diary was timestamped 18 minutes late according to my email in box.  My hussy was upset as she stated she had sent it before the deadline.  I was able to investigate a little more and establish that her original email had been sent 5 minutes before the deadline.  Cyberspace seemed to have delayed it for an unknown reason.  Feeling generous, I gave her the benefit of the doubt.  For her this meant a reprieve and no punishment.  However, it may well have a positive effect as the 2nd diary arrived with plenty of time to spare.  Fear of failure.  She strives for perfection.  She sets her sights high.  However she is not a natural time keeper and I have had problems in the past with late, or even, missed out diaries altogether.  But this is all to focus her mind.  And you can read some of her words.

1)
"Diary – Friday 12th August 2011 

A week to go now and I have my instructions from You, to prepare myself for the visit to You.  I’m looking forward to it in so many ways, but am also nervous.  I know that in recent months we’ve not been as active as before and I get scared that my tolerance gets lower.  I always want to be able to cope with whatever my Lady wishes to do to me.  It may not happen but it’s in the back of my mind, I don’t want to let You down. 

Mentally I’m getting into the right frame of mind.  My books are to hand and do help.  I’m starting to think to plan the only elements of a session that I have any control over and ensuring my appearance will please You. 

I miss You so much and can’t wait to be with You again, kneeling before You, where I belong."

2)
"Diary – Sunday 14th August 2011 

I’m starting to feel a little calmer now.  I know that there are currently no punishments due, especially after the delay of my last diary was resolved.  It’s not just punishments that I worry about being able to handle.  I want to be able to cope with anything You might want to be in the mood to do.  I can’t help the fear of failure, it is part of me and not something I can stop, no matter how much I wish that I could. 

I’m looking forward to daily service.  I do so love even the simple tasks like massaging Your feet.  It gives such a sense of fulfilment being able to bring You pleasure and relaxation.  Knowing each day will contain something for You and with You is very exciting. 

... My books have a proper permanent place on the book shelves and I’ve the space to be able to train properly again now too.  I’m looking forward to a training session tonight...The very idea of over a week together is a tremendous delight, it seems like an age since that last happened.  February I suppose it was.  I do miss You horribly at times but hope that we’ll find a balance during our time together."

A week to go

The countdown has begun.  Just a few days now until my hussy arrives at the end of next week.  It will be wonderful to see her and I certainly have plans!  But first I need to get her focused and in the right mindset.  To aid this I have sent her early instructions.  They are here for you to read and are typical of the kind of instructions I send her whenever she visits me, or I visit her.  I add or delete things depending on my mood.  I think she's in no doubt from these instructions of what kind of mood I'm already in...

"My darling Hussy

It is nearing the time of your visit and I am issuing you with specific instructions.  I expect you to follow my orders precisely as listed below:

1)   You will refrain from pleasuring yourself (touching ban) from 11pm on Wednesday 17 August.

2)   You will read your sub books and meditate each day to ensure you establish the right headspace for my visit.

3)   To continue with your training on a daily basis.  This is not for pleasure and you will not orgasm from it.  Until your touching ban occurs, you can orgasm for pleasure separately.  Training reinforces the bond between you and your Lady.

4)   Wherever possible you will wear the jewelled butt plug for a minimum of an hour each day.

5)   You will write a diary for me to be sent to my usual email address no later than 11pm on the following days:

·         Friday 12 August

·         Sunday 14 August

·         Tuesday 16 August

·         Thursday 18 August

These diaries should tell me how your preparation and training is progressing and that you are becoming mentally prepared for your visit.

6)   To ensure you are shaved and presentable at anytime for my immediate inspection which may be unannounced.

7)   To ensure that your wash bag, toy bag and cushion are available at any time I chose to inspect or make use of them.

8)   To bring your hair brush with you.

9)   To bring with you three sets of lingerie and appropriate clothing for your sessions.  Other clothing should enable you to be smart yet comfortable as you will be instructed to serve me at any time.  I will leave the choice up to you but the lingerie and clothes must be clean.  For your session your hair must be presented in a pony tail.

10)  You will not wear panties on your drive down from xxxxx to my home on Friday 19 August.  If panties are permitted, it will be at my discretion.

11)  To be fully prepared mentally and physically.  I expect complete obedience and compliance at all times.

Your Lady

X"

Back to normality

I am back home after a long 3 days and nights with my hussy. It was an awful wrench to leave her but the compensation is knowing that we will be back together again in 4 weeks time. And then we will be together for more than a week. But the last three days were wonderful especially as it was her birthday on Sunday - the first time we'd been able to spend her birthday together. And I gave her a birthday treat!

The time was spent re-bonding as it's been a long time since we've had a proper session. Bonding again in so many ways- physically and emotionally. Shopping on Saturday, something we haven't done for a while. Nilla shopping and sexy shopping is always a great combination! She had to get herself a new vibrator, which I put to good use on her birthday! But that was after we'd spent a lovely day out in the countryside with a pub lunch followed by a walk in a local park, and sharing locally made ice cream together. Back at her home, I took my time with a session which was emotional for her and hugely satisfying for me. She did her hair in plaits just for me as she knows I love to pull them.

Now I am back home and back to normality. Yes there is something missing inside of me as I sit here typing this, talking to her on MSN as I write. I miss her, in many many ways. I'm sure the high of the weekend will burst and I will experience the drop at some point, as she will too. We have learned to cope with it by talking to each other about how we feel. The e-sessions also help to keep the bond, keep the focus. But nothing can substitute the physical touch.

I know we're luckier than most, we get to meet up on a regular basis, can plan those events around our lives. Our relationship is more than D/s, we love in equal measure, and make sure there is balance between both sides of us. And in between our meetings is normality. And though that normality keeps apart, it also helps to keep us sane. Sometimes emotions break through the normality, but we wouldn't be human if that didn't sometimes happen. My work and home life help to stop me brooding over my hussy's absence. They are an important part of my life, and help to shape the person I am. The routine and structure of an average working day and average home life are necessary, are important. They help to keep my focused and I probably apply that to my D/s too. Structure and focus. My instructions, the e-sessions, the training - it all helps to make the physical sessions something special.

This wasn't intended to be such a long post. I know we all deal with LDR's in our own way, find our own balance, our own coping mechanisms. I find writing and talking the best way to cope. I have an extra day off tomorrow to do food shopping, take a pet to the vets, and probably do the mundane such as cleaning and ironing before I return to work on Wednesday. And I will be there for my hussy to help her through the next few days as my absence makes its own impact on her life. So getting back to normal is all part of the process with LDR's. No matter how much you wish it wasn't...

Needs

These 7 weeks have been a long time.  Not the first time we have been separated for a longer than usual period of time.  We've been apart for 8 weeks and we were both desperate.  We have (again) both been busy with home and work life, so many days and nights, I have not dwelt on the separation.  But recently my thoughts have been consumed by nothing else.  At work, I am focused, committed to a job that I adore.  At home, I am the same as anyone else with responsibilities.  Helping, caring, cooking, cleaning, and some me time too.  And in the quieter times, late at night, I feel my needs pushing to the surface.

My needs are simple and few.  I need to feel her, touch her, inhale her scent.  I need to take her, pull her by her pigtail, make her look up at me with adoring eyes.  I need to hear her voice, obey my instructions, attend to my whims.  I need to be worshipped, mentally and physically.  To be pampered, waited on, servitude.  I need to spank her, tease and deny her, gag her with her wet panties, bind her breasts, tweak her nipples, pull and pinch them, slap her tits, fill her holes with toys, make her cum and yet beg for more.  Do anything I want, because I can.

And when this is done, I need to surrender to her as her lover, give myself to her.  Feel her lips upon my skin, hear her moan with pleasure, go to sleep with her, wake up in the same bed as her.  Lie like spoons, feel her breathing against my back.  Trace the outline of her lips with my finger.  Make love forever and melt into one.  Just be together.

This is what I need.  I need her.  After almost 7 weeks I feel the end of the drought approaching.  I know I will almost drown in her.  Oh what bliss it shall be.  Only four sleeps remain until we are together again.  And I will get what I need.

Starting a countdown

In less than 2 weeks time, I hope to be reunited with my hussy.  When we do finally meet, it will have been 7 long weeks apart.  Home life has been a distraction (and sometimes a bit stressful) which has prevented me from being too melancholy over the separation.  Sometimes I have dwelt on it, late at night when I'm alone.  And when I do, I miss her on so many levels.  Not just as my hussy, my slut sub.  She's my lover and my friend.  I've actually come out of Domme mode, not had much chance to even think about that side of things.  Now that the days are counting down and soon will be into single figures, my mind returns to familiar things.

The weekend we meet will be my hussy's birthday.  So it will be special regardless of what happens.  But I want her to prepare for my arrival.  For her to perform some anal training in the week beforehand.  To ensure she is perfectly shaved, scrubbed and ready.  I will send her instructions.  I expect them to be adhered to.  She will go on a touching ban, no orgasms.  As my mind sets into Domme mode, so I want her to focus on being my slut, my hussy.  To be mentally prepared as well as physically.  The best thing is she won't know what to expect.  What ideas I might have, when I will want her to serve me, dictate how she may dress, how to behave.  I like to surprise her.

I will also ensure there is balance, the harmony between D/s and our loving relationship.  But I know that I do want a couple of good sessions, we need to bond again.  Of course any relationship goes through phases and with all the best will in the world, life sometimes gets in the way.  Stops the best laid plans from happening.  I'm hoping that this time, we can enjoy the best of both worlds in complete privacy.  And revel in the emotions of love, lust, dominance and submission.

Changes

More specifically changes in myself.  Since I started this particular journey, I have changed.  I am not a naturally confident person.  I was bullied at school.  I've had bad experiences in previous relationships which have left their mark mentally rather than physically.  I always prefer to be in the kitchen at parties.  I'm the perennial wallflower.  I blend into the background rather than stand out.  All these aspects are at odds with what I am doing now.  But I have noticed subtle changes within me, which also show outwardly.

This particular journey in my life is starting to become something of an Epiphany.  Being dominant is at odds with my shy nature, uncertain at gatherings, nervous of public speaking, not one to step up to the plate and announce her presence.  And though I love clothes, I dress to remain invisible to everyone, don't allow myself to stand out.  No bright colours.  I don't want to draw attention to myself.  Amazing what your past can do to your present.  Though there has always been a part of me that wants to be my true self.  I have "argued" with myself - tried to justify why I shouldn't wear that skirt to work, that colour blouse or those boots or heels.  I just don't want to stand out and draw unwanted attention to myself.  Because I lack confidence in myself.

Now I feel like a hermit crab, coming out of my shell.  My shell has been my protection, my barrier against my fears.  Most of those fears are of my own making though a few are the product of my past.  Ones that I have allowed to dominate me, dominate my personality.  There's also a tiny self destruct button which I naturally push whenever anyone gets close to me emotionally and physically.  It's self preservation, a gut reaction.  Since starting out on my fledgling wings as a Domme, I have struggled to accept who I am.  Some of those struggles are already detailed in earlier posts on my blog.  Accepting my dominant side and reconciling it with what I was doing with P was a journey in itself.  I even stepped away from it completely for a few months before the calling returned, stronger than ever.  And since then, I haven't turned away from it.  I have embraced it, nurtured it, enjoyed it, loved it, fantasised and lived it.  I do all those things now and it gets stronger with each passing day.  Sometimes I still feel I have two sides to myself, rather like a coin.  Sometimes I know it is an essential part of me, one that has to be given freedom.  And part of that freedom is to have the confidence in myself.

My photos which are on FetLife are probably one of the biggest indicators of the changes I have and am going through.  The early ones show my face hidden behind a venetian mask, lots of leg and foot shots and a few full length ones.  But the mask hid who I was.  As P took more photos, I found myself enjoying it more and more.  And that showed as I ditched the mask and flirted with the camera.  And not just with the photos that are on FetLife.  There are many that are just "for our eyes only", for both P and I to enjoy.  I enjoy teasing and flirting, posing and causing a few ripples of excitement when the photos are uploaded.

Being dominant is spreading into my real life.  Mainly in the way I think and feel and react to the world around me.  As my mum said a little while ago "I'm too old to worry about what people think of me."  And that has always been one of my problems, worrying about what people think of me.  Slowly I have stopped worrying.  Embracing my dominance has given me the confidence to wear the clothes I like, the shoes I like and incorporate this when at work and out of work.  I used to wear trousers at work and never show my legs.  Now I have dresses and skirts, wear knee high boots in winter, high heels now the sunny days are here.  And since I have been on a workout regime since the beginning of the year, I have been able to buy fitted clothes and show off my new, sleeker figure.  And all this makes me feel good.  I walk a little taller, a step stronger, head a little higher, back a little straighter.  I feel proud of my appearance, the way I look.  I've had compliments and close friends have noticed the subtle differences in how I act as well as look.  What changes inwardly is shown outwardly.  I'm not pretending to have full and complete confidence, but it's more than a start.

For me these changes are unexpected but a welcome side affect to being a dominant.  I want to enjoy the new found personal freedom it is giving me.  The slow release from old mental chains is a relief, though scary as I find my feet and strive to reach the right balance.  But it's also an exciting phase in my life as I embrace this new side of me.  Knowing the affects I have on others, people who enjoy my photos, converse with others who are either dominants or submissives.  The thrill of knowing what I can do and what is to come.  And have the confidence not to retreat back into my shell.  All these changes are making a difference to my life.  It's something I didn't expect, but something I'm willing to embrace and continue to grow.

The Holy Grail

My hussy stayed for a few days recently.  I was at work during the week, so she was able to relax at home and went out with my best friend.  They enjoy each other's company.  In the evenings, I would come home to find her waiting with a hug and a kiss.  It's lovely to know she's there waiting.  She served me diligently, being attentive to my every need.  Before bed, I was treated to blissful foot massages with oils and creams.  She watched mesmerised as I would roll my cigarettes for the next day.  I tease her about my nimble fingers as they twist and turn, my tongue licking the paper before creating the perfect cigarette.  I had planned a session for the Friday evening.  However, I received some upsetting news and the stress completely threw me out of my mind set.  I decided it was better to cancel it as I didn't want to take it out on her physically.  Besides I just wasn't in the mood for it anymore.  I apologised but P is always understanding.  As she told me, there will be plenty of other opportunities to come.

Saturday was spent out together shopping and eating out with lots of loving in the evening.  On the Sunday, she was due to leave at lunchtime.  She needed to get home earlier than usual to sort some things out before going back to work.  I didn't want her to go, I never do.  Letting go is always the hardest part.  More so this time as it would be 7 weeks before we saw each other again.  My hormones were raging.  She was trying to pack.  I watched her pack then couldn't restrain myself anymore.  I needed one last taste of passion.

I closed the bedroom door and walked over to her.  I was probably giving off enough sparks to light a bonfire.  It wasn't long before we were kissing and pawing at each other.  I virtually ripped her clothes off before we fell on the bed.  Normally we make love slowly with lots of stroking, arousing, tenderness mixed with deep passion.  Not that lunchtime.  I needed release, I needed to feel her skin on my skin, her fingers on my body and her tongue on my skin.  It wasn't long before P's lips slid down my body towards my pussy.  I was more than ready.  I almost leapt off the bed when her tongue connected.  It's been a while since I've been so worked up before being touched.  P loves giving oral sex and I enjoy it thoroughly.  Her goal has always been to make me orgasm from her tongue.  Earlier blogs have explained that for some reason, I have only been able to get so far before needing a toy to complete the process.  Though the last couple of times, I have seemed to be more attuned to her.

I lay on the bed, my legs spread over P's shoulders as her tongue worked its magic.  I was very sensitive, throbbing and needing release.  I actually don't know how long P's head was between my thighs, I only remember clutching her hair, moving her head where I wanted it, where I needed it.  Her tongue moved fast, her lips sucked and kissed.  My thighs gave the first signal just before I felt the tingle.  Oh. My. I vaguely remember saying "oh shit!" or something but the orgasm was so intense, it just flooded my body and my senses.  P just kept her tongue going as I writhed on the bed, almost crushing her head between my thighs.  It wasn't just one, I know I had at least two or may be three before I actually had to stop her.  The intensity was so different to my favourite toy.  It was a bit of a shock that the impossible happened.

Afterwards, P lapped up my cum like cream and even that was almost too much to bear as my pussy was hyper sensitive by then.  Then she crawled up the bed to rest beside me and hold me in her arms.  The grin on her face couldn't have been wider or brighter.  It took me a while to recover.  A happy recovery, getting my breath back as I was smothered in musky kisses, tasting myself on my lips from her lips.  P giggled as she said my thighs had twitched before she felt my pussy cum all over her.  She had to push my thighs apart as I'd tried to crush her while keeping my orgasm going for as long as possible.  It was, and is, almost impossible for me to believe it happened.  I just lay there at once relieved and amazed at my own body.  P just grinned.  I don't think either of us can wait for the next time.  Of course my antics delayed her departure, but I'm sure she didn't mind why.

@The_Lady_Xanax

Yes I have now fully embraced the 21st Century and joined Twitter.  There is a simple logo on the front page of my blog for you to click on, read my tweets and 'follow' me.  The blog enables me to write more in depth, explore the world of BDSM to the full and share it with you.  Twitter will be more spontaneous, brief and give an insight into daily feelings and going on's.  Please feel free to follow me on Twitter and converse with me.

Politeness and respect will always be rewarded when you send me a tweet.  And I certainly look forward to hearing from you.  I do intend to tweet as often as possible, some of them will be more 'vanilla' depending on my whims.  Though I won't tweet mid session with my hussy.  I have to draw a line somewhere!  But expect some interesting tweets afterwards!  Oh and as Lady, I will embrace the Queen's English - don't expect text speak!

Business as usual

Another weekend, another session.  Six weeks apart meant that I was (quite literally) climbing the walls.  Mentally I was more than ready for her arrival.  P admitted she was quite nervous before her visit.  We talked about this, even I was a little nervous.  It had been a while since we'd last had a proper session.  We needed to reconnect as D/s, I needed to reclaim her.  I emailed P her regular visit instructions which help her to focus, get back into the mind set.

On Friday, it was all about being together again as human beings.  How much I had missed her scent, her touch.  Just holding her in my arms was enough to bring light and love to my soul.  I did check she had followed my no panty rule and was rewarded with being able to feel her smooth skin through her cotton skirt as I rubbed her bum.  Yummy.  I did press her into service later in the evening.  I love foot massages and she loves to give them to me.  So I watched her massage warm oils into my feet and ankles, relaxing me as her fingers pressed in the right places.  Then she applied soothing moisturiser to make my skin smooth and silky.  Later she gave me a head massage.  Something I also adore.  Very relaxing and de-stressing.

On Saturday we went shopping.  Again it was more of a chance for us to be together, walk with fingers entwined, share time and space together.  The simple things are the sweetest.  Having lunch, browsing shops.  I was treated to a new bullet vibrator.   A bright pink one.  Yummy yummy!  All the time I would give her sly looks, looks she knew only too well.  A twinkle in my eyes, a wry smile.  The smile of knowing.  A hand down her back, a brief caress of her bum to let her know what was to come.  And inside I was nervous, excited, filled with anticipation.

Back home we chilled for a while together sipping tea.  I smoked.  I checked the time.  I always allow P 15-20 minutes to change and prepare.  I gave her warning of the time I wanted her to be ready and come to my chamber.  Now the butterflies take hold for both of us.  I prepared my chamber, changed my clothes, made sure all was perfect.  My way of mental preparation.  Getting into the blessed zone.  A zone which had been sleeping for a while.  But as I sat and waited on my bed, I was very much back in that zone.  I knew exactly what I wanted, what I needed, what P needed.  At the appointed time, there was a knock at my door.  I bade her to enter.

She came to me, dropped to her knees.  She kissed my hand as is the protocol.  And so it began.  Touching, stroking, teasing. This time I undressed her, slowing unbuttoning, unzipping, removing, revealing.  Time to inspect.  A chance to be intimate with my hussy before drawing her across my lap, trapping her legs between mine to keep her still.  I spank, warming up her pale skin, watching the skin turn red.  I switched from using my hand - pure skin on skin to a slipper.  P mewed and bucked on occasion when I hit a sweet or tender spot.  She wriggled across my lap.  Mentally and physically she is now attuned to spanking, it makes her pussy wet, she gets excited.  Even when I picked up the dreaded hair brush.  It is more intense, and once it connected with her already tender skin, P was really mewing and writhing.  But her body betrays everything.  I teased her over this and her silence confirmed her answer.

I bade her to stand.  Time for nipple play.  Something I love.  She stood quite still while I removed her bra, her last item of clothing.  Her large, firm breasts beckoned.  I fondled them first, got them and her aroused.  Then I applied my favourite nipple clamps. They are pink and have a bell on the end.  So when she jigs up and down, she tinkles.  The pincers are long and envelop the nipple, squashing it exquisitely.  When they were secured, I slapped her breasts, squeezed them, roughed them up making the bells sound.  I watched her reaction, her sharp intake of breath as the clamps bit home.  I love being able to control her in this way.  I know her limits and like to push them just a little bit more each time.  So I watch for when the signs are visible, the nipples getting angry, heavier breathing, sometimes a mew or a moan.  As I do so, I make her tell me she's a hussy and a slut, my hussy and slut.  Hussys love this, sluts love this.  P has trouble saying these words and I want her to say them out loud.  Repeat them like a mantra.  To reaffirm what she is and accept it.  To know what her submissive soul is.  A true hussy and true slut.  I keep going for longer than usual until I decide to go to the next stage.

I remove the nipple clamps.  The rush of blood to the nipples gives P the all too familiar pain/pleasure sensation.  Time to complete the reconnection.  She lays on her back on the bed and I put on my favourite latex gloves.  I get out the anal toys.  I know how much the snap of the latex glove on my hand sends her into overdrive.  Lube, glove, fingers.  I reclaim her properly.  From fingers to plugs.  Small then medium.  I twist, thrust, push and pull - using her anus how I want it.  The last plug to be used is penis shaped and about the same size as the middle smooth plug.  It also stays in.  P is still on her back, clasping her knees up to her chest.  Fully exposed for my pleasure.  I quickly insert the new plug.  Playing with this one gives different sensations.  It fills her in a different way with its curves and ripples.  It also stays in place without help.  I use this opportunity to spank her while she is plugged.  Yummy.  She reacted totally to the spanking.  I used the hair brush over her tightened, still sore skin and watched her yelp and gasp.  Her body bucked on the bed as I spanked and continued to use the plug until I knew the time to remove it.

Afterwards I cleared the anal toys away.  She drank some water and began to shake.  The emotion of the play was surfacing.  It does if there has been some intense play.  I cuddled her, stroked her hair and soothed her.  Aftercare is important and helps to make our bond stronger, show her how much I care.  I take the opportunity to ask P what she would like to do to me that would make me happy.  Something she enjoys doing.  I wanted to give her a chance to enjoy the last part of our session as much as me.  Without hesitation she replied that she loved to worship me.  Which instantly makes me wet.  P doesn't need to be told twice.  I let her worship me starting at my breasts before she works her way down.  The first time her lips touch my pussy, I buck and writhe as I am already aroused after our session.  I grab her hair and push her head where I want it, where I need it.  She loves to be used in this way.  Her dream is to make me cum with oral and though mostly I enjoy it, only once or twice has it ever been more than that.  Once in the shower and when I went to stay with her in March it was particularly good.  Last Saturday was the best yet in terms of arousal.  Her technique has improved but also my body is clearly reacting more to the stimulation.  Eventually P had to concede that the bullet would be the only way for me to gain blessed relief.  She dutifully gave me her bullet and I bade her to lay in my arms while I set the vibrator to work.  My orgasm was hard and wonderful.  And even more wonderful was curling up with P afterwards, both of us glowing from the excitement, adrenalin and sheer euphoria of session.  And when we're like that, that's when we're as close as two people can be.

My Hussy is back

I received a text this morning from P saying she had arrived back in the UK and was going back to her home.  Never has my heart been so full of joy.  And the countdown is already on.  Five sleeps until she is with me again.  Five sleeps until she will be with me again, to do with as I please.  I am already making plans and it makes my juices flow and dominant soul sing.  Her visit will end our six weeks apart which have felt longer and harder than any of our other separations.  Time and distance has played their part in this.  Now she is home and I feel the urges rise again.  Those wonderful, sweet urges of adrenalin, excitement and anticipation of things to come.  Though our time together will be short, just a weekend, I want to remember, feel and live every second.  Feel every part of her as she lays across my lap, so I can spank her lovely white bum.  Feel her squirm, wriggle and mew through her panty gag, something I love to do to her.  Watch the white skin glow from pink to red.  And play with her to my hearts content.  All these things I want to do, and I can't wait.

Text Porn

As you are aware, P is away on holiday - Dubai - visiting her family.  She sent me a text to say she was on the beach, soaking up the sun.  Then I received another text, a photo this time of a lovely palm tree set against clear blue sky.  This was her view of the world today.

My view of the world was my garden as I was mowing the lawn, also taking advantage of the lovely sunny weather we are having in the UK at the moment.  It was whilst doing that, an idea came to mind.  After doing the gardening, I went inside to take a shower.  Beforehand, I replied with my own photo taken on my mobile.  A different kind of hedge, just to remind my hussy of what she was missing.  Something intimate yet pornographic.  My wonderful neatly trimmed triangle with just a peak of heaven.  She'll be with me again in two weeks time and I am already plotting and planning for her weekend visit.  I just want to tie her up, gag her and spank her until she moans for mercy.  I want to turn her pale white bottom rosy red with the hairbrush.

I just wish I could have seen the look on her face when she looked at the photo I sent her...

I'm only human

Yep even dominants are human. My hussy has gone away for 2 weeks. She's visiting family abroad for the Easter holidays. I'm not jealous or envious. Well just a tad because she's somewhere sunny and hot and I'm here in the UK, though today has been quite sunny minus the heat! But because of the time difference, the level of communication between us will be very limited. When I'm working, I don't get home until the evening and she will be getting ready for bed. I hope the weekends might be better as I can get online earlier and she can stay up a bit later.

But it doesn't stop me missing her, badly. Primarily as my lover and friend, always there whether we talk to each other or not. I know she's there. Now she's not. She's far away. I know it's only 2 weeks, but right now it seems an eternity. My heart aches and I feel an emptiness inside. In our D/s I'm the strong one, the dominant one who controls. Derives my excitement from her submission. In our RL relationship, we are equals and sometimes I relinquish responsibility. All I crave are hugs, kisses and cuddles and surprisingly reassurance. Having had bad relationships in the past, I am inherently insecure with personal relationships always looking for the ending before getting past the start line. My hussy is the first person to have the patience to open my heart and love me in so many ways and on so many levels. I love her and I'm in love with her. To me she's a wonderful woman with a heart of gold and the patience of a saint. She's put up with my mood swings, tears, pangs of jealousy, crisis of conscience, insecurities and so much more over the last couple of years. But in many ways she has shown me that I can love and be loved in return without the fear it will all turn to sand and trickle through my fingers.

I've always been open and honest. I warned my hussy not to expect too much from me in our RL relationship, but she has been patient and persevered in her belief that I could open up to her. I have and sometimes I am frightened she will find someone else especially as she is younger than me. But her faith is unshakable and I have learned to accept what we have now is more important than any unfounded paranoia. So after all my ramblings I suppose I wanted to show how a dominant person such as myself is human, has feelings, and misses her hussy so much. I will miss her every day. She has a part of me with her as I sent her some cards to open over the next two weeks. I'm just a hopeless romantic! And I know she is planning to come down to see me a few days after she gets back. I shall be waiting with open arms and an open heart.

Equilibrium

There are times when despite the opportunity, things don't always go according to plan.  Or maybe it was never meant to be that way in the first place.  Which is what happened to us a couple of weekends ago.  I drove up to visit P for one of our weekends together.  I was full of anticipation and the car contained my usual array of clothes, lingerie and toy box - well more like a holdall.  Domestic life had been incredibly busy for me in the run up to the weekend, so much so that it wasn't until the day before that I allowed myself to get excited about the visit.  Normally I plan for any visit in advance.  Get a schedule in my mind of what to do and when to do it.  With only 48 hours to utilise, I always have more to do than hours available.  But that doesn't normally stop me.  So I had a rough plan wanting to ensure the right mix of D/s and "us" time.

Once I arrived at P's house, I had time to unpack, have lunch and take a bath before she arrived home from work.  I text her asking her to come straight upstairs.  She didn't know in what context the message was sent.  So it was my pleasure to greet her laying on her lovely double bed, in my sexy lingerie that she had bought for me, covered with scented rose petals.  I am a hopeless romantic.  And there is something decadent about making love at 4 o'clock in the afternoon.  Post orgasm, lying together, arms and legs entwined is always a special place to be in body and spirit.

I think this set the tone for the rest of the weekend.  Mentally I relaxed and found the desire to dominate subside.  I just wanted to enjoy the time we had together as friends and lovers.  We had a lovely day out on the Saturday exploring the nearby countryside, having lunch, walking and enjoying the scenery.  At home, I was content to just be.  Even though P did her usual foot ritual with a lovely massage and pedicure including painting my toenails.  When I had a bath, we talked and kissed and were tender with each other.  Formality was set aside.

On Sunday I had what is becoming my usual photo session.  We always enjoy them for the obvious reasons.  I am just waiting for P to finish editing before she sends them.  Then I can share some of them on FetLife.  Leaving as always is a bitter pill.  Especially as this time it will be six weeks before we meet again.  She is going abroad over the Easter holidays for two weeks to visit family.  With the time difference, there will be little time to communicate properly via MSN or Skype.  It will probably be emails and texts.  But at least it will be communication.

So despite my initial plan, our weekend was tame in D/s terms.  And that wasn't a bad thing.  When P stayed with me for a week at the end of February, we had three rather intense sessions.  I haven't written about them, not because there is anything to hide but because the blog doesn't have to be about every session.  It is more about the journey though the details help to relay that journey.  And I enjoy writing the details.  But obviously we needed balance, a chance to be ourselves without any pressures of performing.  Sometimes I know I put pressure on myself to be her Lady, to be dominant, to be all things for the short space of time we're together.  P has tried to stop me doing this.  It's important for it to be relaxed and natural.  As natural as breathing that I dominate and she submits.  It could be that as our last time was so intense, we needed to step back and breathe together in a different way.  To lay on her bed, waiting, feeling the coil in my tummy, my pussy pulse and throb with excitement, longing for her touch upon my skin was the tonic I needed.  I know now it was the tonic we both needed.

When we next meet, when she drives down to me, I know she will be full of the same anticipation for both aspects of our relationship.  Next time, there will be the tingle of tension for both of us.  The sort that makes you spine shiver and your stomach flip.  Next time will be different again.  And the absence will only add to it.  Balance in all things.

Two Years

730 days or 63,072,000 seconds or 1,051,200 minutes or 17,520 hours or 104 weeks since you first came to stay for a weekend.  A weekend that was the beginning of this journey we have taken together.  A journey that has changed my life completely.

Thank you for everything we have shared, the ups and downs, the tears and laughter, pain and love.  Your trust in me is precious, the gift of your submission wonderful and special, your love for me as your dominant and your equal takes my breath away.  You have become a part of my life and my world and I can not imagine my life and my world without you.

Although today we are apart, our hearts are entwined and the bond between us grows ever stronger.  My precious girl, my darling hussy.  I cherish every second, and keep the memories within me forever.

Handiwork

P has a fixation with my hands.  Mainly because ever since our first session together, my hands are the first thing she sees.  I offer her my right hand to be formally kissed.  Her lips are allowed to touch the back of my hand.  My hands are the centre of her world when we are together.  I have one vice, I smoke.  P loves to see me roll a cigarette, the way my fingers place the tobacco in the rolling machine, turn and twist, then the paper, turn and twist, lick the paper edge, turn and twist, release the cigarette.  She watches me make up small batches for my tin whenever she stays or I am with her.  Her eyes sparkle and dance as she watches.  She seems almost hypnotised.

She loves my nails whether they are painted or not.  I like my nails to have a length.  I look after them.  I smooth and buff them, file them carefully.  I love to paint them with bright colours, mainly dark pinks, purples, dark reds, maroons though during the summer I will be more daring with blues especially on my toenails.  I prefer to paint my own fingernails however, I love to watch my hussy paint my toenails.  It's all part of my essential maintenance and something that I use as part of her servitude to me.  I know that it is something she enjoys.  When I first instructed her to do this, P was clearly nervous but now I do it in a less formalised atmosphere and she knows what is expected of her.  She views it as an honour and a privilege to serve me and loves to pamper me.  And I love being pampered.

Whenever we are together, she knows she will be expected to perform hand massages and foot pedicures.  But with my hands it goes much further than just admiring them.  From the beginning, I've used my hands as objects of pleasure and pain.  I stroke my hussy, stroke her hair, her body especially over her breasts and back.  I use my fingers.  I pinch and play with her nipples, tickle her many sensitive areas.  I use my hands to excite and arouse, play with my hussy any way I want to.  Then I switch tack.  I use my hand to smack her bottom.  I watch as her skin turns from white to rosy pink and then to red.  I scrape my nails over her sensitive red skin making her jump.  I slip my hands between her thighs and feel how wet she is.  I have trained her to like being spanked, how it arouses her, makes her wet.  Make her beg for more.  Know she is embarrassed to ask for more.  I marvel at the hand prints I leave behind.  Sometimes I pinch her sweet spot while spanking to add new dimensions.  I use my fingers to train her anally, probing and stretching, inserting her butt plugs, twisting and pulling.  I have spanked her while wearing a butt plug giving her a new set of feelings.  I like to try out new ways and surprise her.  I have used wax and ice on her body, seen her react, draw sharp breath, mew and moan.

I have photographed my handiwork, when I feel the time is right I may post some of them here or on FL.  She knows this will happen one day.  My hands also hold implements that I use on her.  Nipple clamps that I apply, crop, flogger, ruler and hair brush.  She knows my hands control her as much as my words.  Yet she finds them irresistible whether they are used for my pleasure, her pleasure or her pain.  But always she loves the contact of my hands on her body.  She misses and mourns them when we are apart.  She can visualise every centimetre of them from my wrists to my fingernails.  My rings, my nails, how they feel, their touch on her skin, whether the touches are soft or hard.  She has watched me bathe, use my hands to scrub, shave, cleanse.  Even when I simply do the washing up, she sees my hands as something beautiful.  My handiwork is many things, many layers, applications and sensations.  During aftercare I use my hands to soothe and comfort, caress and love.  Let her know she is safe.  Most of all, whatever side of our relationship, my handiwork is loved.

Something old, something new

29 January 2011 - after a lovely day out in the countryside, where we were also able to take some great photos (some of which are posted on my Fetlife account), my thoughts turned to other things.  The great outdoors had fired up my mojo.  In the morning I had told P to buy a wooden hairbrush.  She calmly told me that she already had one which used to belong to her mum.  I smiled broadly as I could only think of the wonderful ways I could corrupt it.  So on our return, after we ate and refuelled ourselves, I took P upstairs.  But first I asked if she had ice.  Puzzled she said yes.  I told her to take some upstairs with her.  I ordered her to change into something suitable and she chose a lovely black bra and panty set with a bob tail.  I inspected her as I always did to ensure she was shaved and nude.  Then I ordered her across my lap as I sat on her bed.

First I needed to punish her for her late journal.  It was 18 minutes late.  I had the hairbrush ready.  I was looking forward to this.  I told her what would happen, 18 spanks.  The sound of wood on skin is something totally different.  And the effect on her bum was immediate.  She jumped and panted on my lap as I gave out her sharp spanking.  Her skin turned bright red as the hairbrush took its toll.  I could imagine the sting and pain it gave as I alternated across each bum cheek.  When the punishment had ended, P thanked me as she always did.  Then I turned the brush over and dragged the bristles across the sore skin.  P jumped again and inhaled deeply.  The bristles were soft and fine, but I knew that the contact on her sore skin would be incredible.  I carried on spanking her, alternating with bristle dragging.  I opened her thighs and spanked lightly inside and over her sweet spot, that crease where the bottom ends and the upper thighs begin.  The redness increased with the skin's tenderness.  I teased and tested my Hussy to her limits.  I asked her if she liked it.  "Yes."  She breathed.  I asked her if she was excited.  "Yes."  She replied.  I asked her if it made her wet.  "Yes."  I felt between her thighs and could feel her wetness.  Poor Hussy.  She was struggling with the pleasure/pain sensations.  Do you want more?  I asked.  There was a pause, hesitation.  I repeated my question.  "Yes.'"  She replied.  I smiled.  I continued with the hairbrush spanking, ensuring her whole bum glowed with heat.  Dragging the bristles made her gasp and writhe on my lap.  In between I took ice cubes and rubbed them over her skin.  Her reaction was instant.  She bucked and moaned as the cold hit her hot skin.  Then I would spank her wet, sore skin which only made the spanks sound different.  They became more intense for her.  I saw that she rubbed her face into the pillow and I knew I had spanked her to tears.  Something that always gave me a buzz.

I decided she had taken enough of the hairbrush.  I ordered her to stand.  I had already attached wrist and ankle restraints to each of the four corners of her bed.  I told her to lay a large towel on the bed and lay face up.  I fixed her wrists and ankles so she was spreadeagled for me.  Then I blindfolded her.  This was the moment I had planned for.  Something new.  P had no idea what I was going to do which only added to my adrenalin rush.  I took out my candle pack and lit the first one.  I lifted it about 2 feet above her body and waited for the wax to melt.  Then it started to drip.  The molten wax dropped onto her body one splash at a time.  P gasped audibly and writhed in her bonds unable to move.  I started at her tummy and worked my way up to her breasts judging which areas were more sensitive than others.  I watched the wax cool and harden.  As it did so, P's skin tightened and puckered and the edges around the wax turned pink.  I blew out the candle and took an ice cube.  I rubbed it lightly over the waxed skin and P felt an entirely different set of sensations.  Fire and Ice.  I let the ice melt over her body.  P groaned and panted breathless in her bonds.

I lit the candle again and dripped some more wax onto her body.  I aimed for her heaving breasts, layering the wax over her nipples so they turned opaque.  For P it was sensation and emotion overload.  Her nipples became rigid from the hardening wax.  Again I applied ice to her sensitised skin and smiled as she writhed and moaned on the bed.  Occasionally she shivered as the ice affected her so I would cover her with a spare towel between times to keep her warm.  I uncovered her to start again, dripping the wax down her tummy which caused her to yelp softly.  It was very much a learning curve for both of us.  I dripped some on her bare pussy which made her yelp louder so I stopped.  I placed the ice on her tummy, popping it into her belly button before sliding it down her pussy.  I let it rest and melt on her clit hood.  It was delicious to watch as drops of cold water disappeared down her pussy.  P squirmed and mewed on the bed.  I fell in love with this exquisite game of intimate torture which patterned P's body like cracked opaque glass.

I gauged when to end the session.  I untied P's wrists and ankles before removing her blindfold.  She adjusted to the soft lighting around her.  Then she looked down at her body and laughed softly.  It was an encouraging response to the session.  Her breasts were smothered, nipples encased so much they were stiff peaks of wax, her tummy was splattered and tiny rivers of wax had been created that ran down to her pussy.  Her eyes sparkled at the sight.  Together we began to scrape the wax off her body.  Soon there was a sizeable pile of it on the towel.  We scooped it up and disposed of it.  Then I held P softly in my arms, cuddling and cradling her.  It has been quite an experience for both of us.  I asked if she was ok and she assured me she was.  I knew she had been slightly overwhelmed and wanted to reassure her as well as myself.  I felt her relax.  I knew it would have been an odd session for her as there was a distinct lack of physical contact with me.  But that didn't stop it being a dynamic session and one that stretched P to her limits.

For a couple of hours, we had explored new and wonderful territories with something old - the fabulous wooden hairbrush, and something new - wax and ice.  And I want to do it again and again.  With wax I want to master it and be able to use it to its full potential.  To cover her body with different colours.  But most of all I want to push P's limits, get her to experience and embrace new sensations.  And I want her to love it as much as I do.

28 January 2011

Left my home 09:06
Arrived at P's house 13:10
Settled in, ate lunch which she had kindly provided for me
Had a secret bath
Scrubbed, shaved, cleansed, moisturised
Prepare bedroom for romantic surprise
P arrives home 15:35
Allow her to wind down, drink tea, chat about her day
Cuddle with her cats on the sofa
Lots of kisses
17:15 take her upstairs
Bed covered in scented rose petals, light candles, close curtains
**use your own imagination for the next two and a half hours**
19:45 go back downstairs for dinner
Watch TV
Eat fish finger sandwiches, potato wedges and mayo
Drink tea
I smoke
Another bath
My hussy serves me while I bath
Drink Bucks Fizz in the bath, how decadent
Allow my hussy a glass of Bucks Fizz for being a good girl
Leave bath
She helps me dry, put on bath robe
Go downstairs
Chill out and relax
Plan our next day
I smoke
We go to bed
Drink the rest of the Bucks Fizz in bed while snuggled up under the duvet
Turn out lights
Spoon together in bed
Bliss...

Shiny Shiny

There was one item that had lain undisturbed in P's toy box.  She'd purchased it a few months back and I had often looked at it in it's box.  But somehow, it had never been the right moment to try it out on her.  I wanted it to be special, for both of us but especially for my hussy.  As once it had been used, it would start a new chapter in one part of her training.  The new, unused, virgin item was a shiny steel pink jewelled butt plug.  And it's intended use is to train P to wear it for extended periods of time.  So I chose the new year to be the time to introduce this.

Of course there is always an initial apprehension that the plug won't do its job e.g. remain in place.  Though having researched these kind of plugs for a while, I was confident that the one P had purchased was fit for purpose.  I warmed P up in this session with my usual breast/nipple torture which she obviously enjoys as well as some mild spanking.  Well mild in terms of some I've done!  Once P was suitably excited and in her sub zone, I ordered her onto the bed on to her hands and knees.  I much prefer to insert butt plugs from this angle as it tends to provide deeper penetration and ensures maximum sensitivity for P.  As always I started with one of her plugs just to pave the way.  I deliberately used the curved, rippled one which I know remains stubbornly in place.  I made sure I only used enough lube for the job as P's anus is now suitably stretched and trained to take this particular style and size of plug.  The only one that she can't stretch to is the largest one in her trio set.  But to be honest, I don't think it's the size of the plug that matters, more the shape, style and whether it holds inside the anus without recourse to other assistance.

I told P to stand, walk around, kneel, stand up again and generally get used to the feeling and fullness that the plug evoked.  I could tell she was excited to be using and wearing it again.  Then I ordered her to assume her usual position on the bed so I could remove it.  Next I opened the box and took out the wondrous shiny, shiny butt plug.  I smiled though P couldn't see my smile.  I applied the bare minimum of lube as her anus was well lubricated already.  The steel was incredibly cold which would only add to the sensations.  Then I parted her butt cheeks and slowly applied pressure to insert it.  At first it seemed stubborn then there was a glorious pop noise as her anus opened up and seemed to swallow it whole.  I continued to gently push on it until the pink jewelled end settled nicely over her rosette.  Carefully I let go of her bum cheeks and allowed everything to settle down.  P had gasped and moaned as the plug had been swallowed up by her anus.  The cold steel obviously making its presence felt.

Now for the moment of truth.  I told her to stand up.  Slowly she did so.  Success.  The plug remain firmly in place.  Again I told her to walk around, kneel down, stand up again and finally bend over to present her sparkly anus to me.  P parted her bum cheeks to expose herself to me.  The pink faceted stone twinkled brightly under the chamber lights.  We were both so pleased.  I told her to turn around and look for herself in my large mirror.  She seemed to be fascinated to see it there.  P explained that the cold steel was warming up inside her.  The sensations were almost overwhelming for her as she walked around, feeling the plug firmly settled in her anus.  She felt full, aroused and excited as she could feel it move as she moved around.  And there was no sign of the plug failing.

After twenty minutes, I decided that was long enough for her to wear it on a first outing.  So with some regret on both sides, I removed the plug.  I instructed P to wear it daily (as long as she was able to do so) for up to an hour every day.  I wanted her to become accustomed to prolonged wear of the plug that I would gradually increase until I was confident she could wear it for several hours without fear of it failing.  So I'm really hoping we'll be able to go out shopping one day in the future with her wearing some unseen jewellery which only bonds her to me even more.

Shiny shiny...

Some like it rough

I pulled you into the chamber without warning.  You were unprepared and that was how I wanted it.  I walked around you as you stood so still, breathing as slowly as possible to steady your nerves.  I pulled your hair, yanked your head back towards me.  I growled into your ear, you shivered against me.  I smiled though you couldn't see it.  I rubbed myself against your back before walking around you again.  I tell you what to do, you obey without question.  The thrill of dominance and submission fills me as you remove your top revealing your bra.  I take your breasts out of the bra and start to tease, torture your nipples.  You sigh and moan with equal measure.  I pick up my riding crop and begin to flick it across your breasts, your nipples.  You inhale and seal your lips together.  Good girl.

I walk around you so I stand behind you.  I use the crop on your backside, through your trousers, using the whole length of the crop.  I know you will feel it keenly despite the layers.  I alternate with rubbing the crop under your crotch, deliberately pulling the rough crop over the seam, pulling on your clit through your clothes.  I grab your hair as I do this, telling you how much you love it, how much you need it.  You agree eagerly, nodding and gasping for breath.  I continue to tease, smack.  I reach forward to play with your breasts again.  You feel the mix of pleasure and pain.  I nip your neck with my teeth, make you tell me who owns you, that only I can do this to you.

For what seems an eternity, I have you in my power.  I can do what I will, how I will.  I smack your bum harder and harder with the crop so you feel it, know who is in charge.  You inhale deeply, trying not to yelp or whimper.  I pull your hair, kiss your mouth, slap your breasts.  Then as suddenly as I start, I let go of your hair and stop.  I can almost hear your whimper of disappointment.  I sigh with delight.  And taste the scent of power on my lips.

Slippery when wet

Showering together, one of my favourite pastimes and during the time P stayed with me just after Xmas until the New Year, we had plenty of those together.  Usually it is just vanilla time.  A chance to laugh, kiss, wash each other, share tenderness and love.  Reacquaint each other with our bodies again.  Skin slipping over skin, watching the soap suds flow down your body and look the one you love in the eyes.  See her eyes sparkle at the sight.  Sensuality at its best.

Sometimes the Lady just can't help herself.  And one morning in the shower with P, we were snogging heavily.  No other way to describe it.  Hands wandering, lips sliding, bodies pressed together.  P started to slide her lips down my neck to my breasts.  Bliss.  She looked up and must have seen the look in my eyes, the look of her Lady.  No words were needed as she continued to kiss down my body, over my tummy to my pussy.  I grabbed a handful of her luscious, red hair and directed her to where I needed her.  I know I have written before that although I enjoy oral sex, it never leads to orgasm.  I suppose I might just be wired wrong.

But that morning, in the shower, as she knelt on the floor, fistfuls of red hair in my hands, her tongue and lips working their magic, I felt the first stirrings of real pleasure.  May be it was just the angle, the excitement of being in the shower together, the fact that I was just a horny bitch... I don't know.  It was the closest I got to feeling anywhere near an orgasm.  I savoured every lick, kiss, suck and play upon my clit.  I pulled her face closer, spread my thighs wider, moved her to a better angle.  Bliss.  The water cascaded over and around us, hot water on hot bodies enjoying some hot oral sex.

Definitely slippery when wet...