08 April 2011

Equilibrium

There are times when despite the opportunity, things don't always go according to plan.  Or maybe it was never meant to be that way in the first place.  Which is what happened to us a couple of weekends ago.  I drove up to visit P for one of our weekends together.  I was full of anticipation and the car contained my usual array of clothes, lingerie and toy box - well more like a holdall.  Domestic life had been incredibly busy for me in the run up to the weekend, so much so that it wasn't until the day before that I allowed myself to get excited about the visit.  Normally I plan for any visit in advance.  Get a schedule in my mind of what to do and when to do it.  With only 48 hours to utilise, I always have more to do than hours available.  But that doesn't normally stop me.  So I had a rough plan wanting to ensure the right mix of D/s and "us" time.

Once I arrived at P's house, I had time to unpack, have lunch and take a bath before she arrived home from work.  I text her asking her to come straight upstairs.  She didn't know in what context the message was sent.  So it was my pleasure to greet her laying on her lovely double bed, in my sexy lingerie that she had bought for me, covered with scented rose petals.  I am a hopeless romantic.  And there is something decadent about making love at 4 o'clock in the afternoon.  Post orgasm, lying together, arms and legs entwined is always a special place to be in body and spirit.

I think this set the tone for the rest of the weekend.  Mentally I relaxed and found the desire to dominate subside.  I just wanted to enjoy the time we had together as friends and lovers.  We had a lovely day out on the Saturday exploring the nearby countryside, having lunch, walking and enjoying the scenery.  At home, I was content to just be.  Even though P did her usual foot ritual with a lovely massage and pedicure including painting my toenails.  When I had a bath, we talked and kissed and were tender with each other.  Formality was set aside.

On Sunday I had what is becoming my usual photo session.  We always enjoy them for the obvious reasons.  I am just waiting for P to finish editing before she sends them.  Then I can share some of them on FetLife.  Leaving as always is a bitter pill.  Especially as this time it will be six weeks before we meet again.  She is going abroad over the Easter holidays for two weeks to visit family.  With the time difference, there will be little time to communicate properly via MSN or Skype.  It will probably be emails and texts.  But at least it will be communication.

So despite my initial plan, our weekend was tame in D/s terms.  And that wasn't a bad thing.  When P stayed with me for a week at the end of February, we had three rather intense sessions.  I haven't written about them, not because there is anything to hide but because the blog doesn't have to be about every session.  It is more about the journey though the details help to relay that journey.  And I enjoy writing the details.  But obviously we needed balance, a chance to be ourselves without any pressures of performing.  Sometimes I know I put pressure on myself to be her Lady, to be dominant, to be all things for the short space of time we're together.  P has tried to stop me doing this.  It's important for it to be relaxed and natural.  As natural as breathing that I dominate and she submits.  It could be that as our last time was so intense, we needed to step back and breathe together in a different way.  To lay on her bed, waiting, feeling the coil in my tummy, my pussy pulse and throb with excitement, longing for her touch upon my skin was the tonic I needed.  I know now it was the tonic we both needed.

When we next meet, when she drives down to me, I know she will be full of the same anticipation for both aspects of our relationship.  Next time, there will be the tingle of tension for both of us.  The sort that makes you spine shiver and your stomach flip.  Next time will be different again.  And the absence will only add to it.  Balance in all things.

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